Have you ever been told you should pursue a career because you’d be “great at it”, even if it didn’t excite you?
Or found yourself constantly handed certain tasks at work because you do them well, even though they drain you?
If so, you may be experiencing “the curse of competence”, where being good at something overshadows whether it’s actually right for you.
Are You Using a Real Strength or Just a Learned Behaviour?
One of the biggest career mistakes people make is confusing a real strengthwith a learned behaviour.
🔹 A real strength is something you are good at and also feel confident and energised when using. These are the tasks that make time fly, that you look forward to, and that leave you feeling engaged rather than exhausted.
🔹 A learned behaviour is something you have become good at over time, but it drains you. You may perform well, but you find yourself feeling depleted afterwards. These are the tasks you are known to exceed at but secretly dread.
Understanding this difference is crucial to finding a fulfilling career. If your career is built around learned behaviours rather than real strengths, you’re more likely to feel stressed, disengaged, and ultimately unfulfilled. But if you can identify and align your career with your true strengths, you’ll find work far more enjoyable and sustainable.
How the Curse of Competence Can Hold You Back
🚩 Following a Career Path Based on Aptitude, Not Passion Many of us are encouraged to pursue careers based on what we’re naturally good at, rather than what excites us. This is how I ended up in my first career as a Taxation Consultant after my very well-meaning mother steered me into accounting because I was ‘good at maths’.
Perhaps you were a strong creative writer and pushed towards law only to find that the work bores you to tears. Or perhaps you were great at science and pushed towards medicine but can’t stand dealing with people (one of my dentistry clients actually admitted that she would love her job if she could just take the teeth out and work on them in a back room).
While aptitude matters, it doesn’t guarantee fulfilment. Years down the track, you may find yourself feeling stuck in a career where you are performing well yet totaly disengaged.
🚩 Getting ‘Typecast’ at Work If you excel at a particular task, it’s easy to become the go-to person for it—whether you enjoy it or not. Maybe you’re known for organising systems, training new staff, or solving tech issues, so these tasks land on your desk again and again. While it may seem like a compliment, being trapped in work that doesn’t energise you, can prevent you from growing in areas that align with your strengths. This is often a lightbulb moment in my Strengths Coaching Workshops where a team identify that the work that they are constantly handing to a colleague is a learned behaviour, not a strength (ie they feel de-motivated by these tasks rather than energised).
🚩 Staying in the ‘Safe’ Job Rather Than the Right One If you’ve built a reputation in a particular field, stepping into something new can feel daunting. Many people remain in jobs not because they love them, but because they fear giving up the stability and validation that comes with being seen as “successful.” However, staying in the wrong role for too long can leave you feeling unfulfilled, uninspired, and resentful.
Breaking Free from the Curse of Competence
If any of this resonates, it’s time to reassess whether you are leveraging your real strengths or instead just employing learned behaviours. Here’s how to start:
✅ Identify What Energises You vs. What Drains You – Pay attention to the tasks that excite you versus those that leave you exhausted. This simple awareness can help you make better career decisions.
✅ Challenge the Narrative – Just because others see you as a natural fit for a role doesn’t mean it’s the right one for you. It’s okay to want something different!
✅ Set Boundaries – Learn to say “no” to tasks that don’t align with your strengths. If you’re constantly given work you dislike, redirect those requests or suggest a colleague who might genuinely enjoy them.
✅ Know the Strengths of your Colleagues – Knowing the true strengths of others in your team can help you allocate work to play to everyone’s strengths, leading to a more engaged and fulfilled team.
✅ Seek Career Paths That Leverage Your Real Strengths – Rather than simply following what you’re good at, focus on finding roles where you can use the skills that energise you. This leads to a more fulfilling, less stressful, and more sustainable career.
✅ Get Support – A career coach or mentor can help you identify your true strengths and navigate a transition towards work that excites and fulfils you.
Feeling Stuck in a Job That Doesn’t Energise You?
At Relaunch Me, we help professionals across Australia and New Zealand identify their real strengths and break free from the Curse of Competence.
Contact us to find out more about our Career Coaching Reset Session or our Career Transition Programs.
Until next time
Leah
